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ic contact;;
Hey! You juuust missed me, which is purretty hard to do so good job! Leave a message here and I'll get back to you as soon as I pawsibly can. If it's supurr impurrtant though, you should just try and find me in purrson! It's purrobably a lot easier than waiting fur me to pick up.
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:33 < feferi is perfectly capable of taking care of herself
:33 < im going to look out for her and help her if she n33ds it
:33 < not because i have to or because she cant
:33 < but because shes my friend and i want to do whatever i can to make sure shes ok
:33 < its not some huge burden that i absolutely cant ignore and have to sacrifice my own goals for!
:33 < but i guess youre still dont understand that because youre so caught up in wallowing in whatever the hell your problem is
:33 < why do you care if i live through this universe anyway?
:33 < its not like youve ever really wanted me to survive where it counts before
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Dont You Dare Say That
Who Do You Think I Am Nepeta
What The Hell Do You Know About What I Want Or Care About
I Dont Know Who This Idea Of Me Youve Constructed Is But You Arent Talking To Her
But Thanks A Lot For Having The Sense Of Maturity To Give Me Even The Slightest Benefit Of A Doubt
Youre A Real Friend
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:33 < even after you decided that you knew better than i did about what i could or couldnt handle about my own future! i really did!
:33 < but i dont think that i was ever really your friend
:33 < i mean im sure you thought you were being a good friend to me! but i was really just another little grub to coddle and corral and wipe the dirt off of
:33 < and im not
:33 < im a person just as much as you are and im tired of trying to be a good friend to someone who doesnt even respect me
:33 < so yeah im done giving you the benefit of the doubt or trying to give any more than you are
:33 < im finished being disappointed
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Any Time Ive Tried You Cut It Off As Quickly As Possible
Scurrying Off Like A Squeakbeast Under The Predators Eye
How Can You Say Youve Given Me The Benefit Of The Doubt
Ive Given You Free Reign To Do As You Please For Months And You Act As Though Im Smothering You
You Were Supposed To Be Helping Me To Hold Things Together
I Cant Do That On My Own Nepeta
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:33 < and i guess i was right
:33 < i could come and go whenever i wanted to but you held all of the important stuff away from me unless i forced it out of you
:33 < and i cant help you hold anything together when i dont even think you really believe that i can do anything
:33 < i cant even help you hold yourself together!
:33 < i thought maybe youd really get better after getting ported out but youre just doing the same stuff again and again and i cant fix that
:33 < i shouldnt have to fix that
:33 < and you cant expect people to even want to after you treat them like this!
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I Know I Made The Mistake Of Not Telling You Sooner About Your Death
But How Have I Treated You As Incapable Since
Ive Hardly Been Given Opportunity To Treat You Any Way At All
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:33 < and look how that turned out
:33 < you didnt even want to hear a word i said about it, you just shut me down
:33 < and id b33n noticing that sort of thing for a while before we talked about me dying
:33 < so after that i really didnt want to try anymore
:33 < nothing ever changed except to get worse
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There Will Be Limitations That Are Beyond Us
If I Were Coddling You Like You Accuse Me Of Id Have Let You Accept That Lie
But You Deserve The Truth
Especially After Id Made The Mistake Of Withholding Another Truth For So Long
Truth Is Often Unkind But We Have To Be Strong Enough Ourselves To Meet It
And You Are A Very Strong Troll Nepeta
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:33 < thats you believing that something is impossible to change and not even wanting to think about the possibility that maybe youre wrong
:33 < its you telling someone that they just have to accept that theyre going to die
:33 < if im so strong then why couldnt you have maybe believed in me just this once?
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I Dont Mean It As Anything Against You Personally
None Of Us Can Conquer It And There Have Been Those Who Have Tried
Not Even Your Prior Iterations
I Didnt Say It Would Be Easy To Accept
Or That You Would Have To Do So Alone If You Didnt Want To
But I Dont Know What Else I Can Say To It
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:33 < you cant possibly tell me that in the million billion little twists and turns of paradox space that there isnt some way that i can avoid that
:33 < you just cant
:33 < and its not fair of you to expect me to do that!
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Nepeta I Want It To Be True Just As Much As You Do
The Idea That We Can Go Back And Fix Everything Before Our Own Actions Sour It Is A Tempting One
But Its Also An Empty Fiction
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:33 < and if you want it to be true so badly then why dont you believe that maybe i can actually do it!?
:33 < what is so horrible to you about thinking that im capable of accomplishing something big?
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I Think Youre Capable Of A Great Many Things
But Not This
This Is Something That Simply Cannot Be Done
And Belief On Its Own Isnt Going To Make Truth Of A Falsity
No Matter How Much We May Wish It Would
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:33 < no one does
:33 < so why are you so set on telling me theres no way ill ever do it?
:33 < is it because you couldnt?
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Can You Really Not See Me Imagining Others Achieving What I Cant
Why Are You So Determined To Take This Personally When It Isnt
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:33 < i guess i just take things involving my inevitable death really personally for some reason
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Every Time I Say That No One Can Change It You Recenter It As Though Im Directing It Only At You
As If I Speifically Believe You Incapable Of Anything Because Of It
It Doesnt Change Depending On Who It Is Making The Attempt
This Is A Matter Of Absolutes
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:33 < and of course id talk about me specifically thats who were talking about! my future and my trying to change it!
:33 < uuuuuuuuuugh!!!!
:33 < it doesnt matter were just going to k33p talking in circles
:33 < you dont want to listen
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Im Pretty Damn Sure About These Things Otherwise I Wouldnt Be So Insistent
And Im Not The Only One Refusing To Listen If Thats Even A Thing Im Doing
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:33 < do you know how iffy that sounds?
:33 < and if im not listening then its because im tired of being told the same thing after the thirtieth time!!
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And That Excuse Might Have More Weight If You Didnt Refuse To Listen Just The Same On The Previous 29 Tellings
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:33 < nobody knows what happens when they stay gone
:33 < what am i going to lose if i try? im already dead
:33 < but i guess you dont want to understand that so theres no point in explaining
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Its When We Leave It
I Can Attest To This From Experience Ive Been Back Before
Or Do You Think Equius Simply Decided Not To Disclose Any Of It And Continue Along As If Still Ignorant
His Own Death He Might Hide But He Would Have Tried Harder to Prevent Yours
The Problem Isnt That You Want To Try
Its That Youre Letting The Idea Of Dubious Success Consume You
You Should Enjoy The Time You Have Here While Its Available
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:33 < and dont try and tell me i should be grateful that i get time in the city!
:33 < i still have to go back
:33 < we all have to go back, thats where were n33ded
:33 < and im not going to suddenly forget about whats coming just because i get a few extra perig33s in another universe
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