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ic contact;;
Hey! You juuust missed me, which is purretty hard to do so good job! Leave a message here and I'll get back to you as soon as I pawsibly can. If it's supurr impurrtant though, you should just try and find me in purrson! It's purrobably a lot easier than waiting fur me to pick up.
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11th of november, late at night
YOU SAW HOW MUCH TIME I SPENT ON THAT WHILE I WAS TRYING TO HOLD YOU INSUBORDINATE BULGEGOBBLERS TOGETHER LONG ENOUGH TO SURVIVE THE RECKONING. WASN'T IT OBVIOUS HOW MUCH I WAS ENJOYING MYSELF THAT WHOLE TIME? I CAN'T SEE HOW IT WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN OBVIOUS, WHAT WITH ALL THE FROLICKING AND GIGGLING AND RAINBOWS SHOOTING OUT OF MY EVERY ORIFICE.
SO I JUST FINISHED SCHOOLING KANAYA IN ALL THE WAYS IN WHICH SHE HAS BEEN TERRIBLE AT APPROACHING HER RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU.
AND NOW IT'S YOUR TURN.
TIME TO FESS UP. WHAT'S YOUR SIDE OF THE STORY?
AND BEFORE YOU TELL ME TO PISS OFF, LET ME REMIND YOU THAT THIS ENTIRE FEUD IS INDIRECTLY MY FAULT. NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED IF NOT FOR MY SHADOW'S SHENANIGANS. MY MEDDLING IS TOTALLY JUSTIFIED.
NOW START TALKING.
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[that's all he gets for a solid ten minutes as Nepeta attempts to wrap her head around this text. is this really happening? did she finally eat a bad pigeon and suffer the ill effects that everyone's been telling her would eventually happen?
she can't help but hope that any of these answers are the correct one, because Karkat Vantas demanding the gory details of her falling out with Kanaya causes the sort of embarrassment that is usually reserved for when one's mother shows naked baby pictures to all and sundry.
there is a strong urge to just ignore the message and hope it would go away, but she knows Karkat well enough to know that if she doesn't face the music now she'll just have to at some point in the near future. it doesn't stop her from trying to downplay the issue, of course, but small steps are better than none]
:33 < i dont really know if theres all that much to talk about
:33 < i thought kanaya was my friend but it turns out i was wrong
:33 < so we just dont have much to do with each other anymore
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KANAYA IS YOUR FRIEND, YOU NUMBSKULL.
SHE'S JUST BEEN INDESCRIBABLY AWFUL AT EXPRESSING THAT. LIKE, REALLY BAD. WORSE THAN EQUIUS SMELLS.
FROM WHAT I GATHER COMMUNICATION ON BOTH OF YOUR ENDS HAS BEEN ATROCIOUS. I AM EMBARRASSED TO BE ASSOCIATED WITH EITHER OF YOU.
MORE THAN I USUALLY AM.
NOW STOP TRYING TO WRIGGLE OUT OF THIS AND TELL ME WHAT WENT DOWN FROM YOUR PERSPECTIVE.
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[ok, ok, no. now is the not the time to let that pettiness and hurt leak through. Nepeta pauses, takes a deep breath the way she used to before listening to Equius pour out his troubles, lets her flash of anger out with the exhalation.
just talk, girl. let the truth speak for itself.]
:33 < she knew what happened to me in the future
:33 < i mean, you all did, but she promised to tell me
:33 < but it was always later
:33 < but then the shadows happened and we fought feferi together and she saw what i could do as if the rest of the game wasnt enough, she saw and
:33 < and i talked with your shadow and it was public and she still didnt say anything
:33 < so i asked
:33 < and she wasnt sorry she didnt say anything she was sorry id found out
:33 < and i asked why she wouldnt tell me and it was because she thought i couldnt handle it
:33 < like i was a wiggler and n33ded her to watch over me
:33 < like she had any right to k33p my own future from me
:33 < and then she acted like i was just proving her right because i wanted to try and change it
:33 < like it even matters to her
:33 < and i was so angry but i didnt want to fight so i left it alone
:33 < and we didnt talk but it was ok
:33 < sort of
:33 < but then we got into it again when we were in new vesuvius because she was doing the same stuff with that
:33 < and i was so tired
:33 < but i thought maybe we could just ignore it long enough to get out
:33 < i was wrong
:33 < i got mad
[there's more she could say about the words flung around, Nepeta's moving out, about Kanaya's sudden decision to usurp custody of her cats after months of silence. but the horrible fight they'd had on that post is still raw in some ways and she can't bring herself to move past it just yet. let Karkat absorb this chunk first, then move on from it.
not for the first time, she wishes Equius were here. maybe this wouldn't have happened if he were]
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I KNOW WHERE YOU'RE COMING FROM, OK? I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO FEEL LIKE YOUR FRIENDS DON'T RESPECT YOU, OR TRUST YOU, KANAYA IN PARTICULAR.
I DON'T BLAME YOU FOR GETTING PISSED. I WOULD HAVE TOO.
BUT YOU SHOULD TRY TO UNDERSTAND WHERE KANAYA'S BEEN COMING FROM, TOO.
I KNOW HER METHODS CAN BE PRETTY SHITTY SOMETIMES, AS YOU'VE JUST OUTLINED, BUT YOU HAVE TO REMEMBER THE FACT THAT SHE'S USUALLY MOTIVATED BY THE FACT THAT SHE CARES ABOUT YOU.
SHE NEEDS TO ACKNOWLEDGE THAT SHE CAN'T FORCE YOU TO ACCEPT YOUR FUTURE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO, AND WHETHER OR NOT SHE DEEMS YOUR REACTION "MATURE" DOESN'T MEAN SHE OR I OR ANYONE ELSE HAD ANY RIGHT TO WITHHOLD IT FROM YOU. SHE NEEDS TO STOP PATRONIZING YOU.
I'VE TOLD HER THIS.
BUT YOU NEED TO ACKNOWLEDGE THAT THE WAY YOU'VE REACTED HAS BEEN, AND I SAY THIS AS A FRIEND, COMPLETE BULLSHIT.
WHAT'S THIS ABOUT BREAKING INTO HER HIVE?
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so instead she focuses on the practical for now. distasteful (and stupid) as it is, Nepeta can answer the question about the breaking and entering much more easily]
:33 < uuuuuuugh
:33 < did she tell you about the part that happened befur that?
:33 < about her texting me out of nowhere after us not talking fur like months and compurrlaining about how my kitties still think they live at the old hive and show up sometimes?
:33 < and how they k33p showing up beclaws she lets them in and f33ds them???
:33 < beclaws she decided that meant i was being a clawful cat owner and not taking care of them and she was imperial condescension of kitty welfare and got to decide i didnt deserve to have them anymore and she was k33ping them
:33 < so of course i went back to get them
:33 < i went in through a window beclaws i really didnt want to deal with her
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AND HONESTLY I'M INCLINED TO SAY THAT ALTHOUGH IT WAS PRETTY MORONIC OF HER TO CALL YOU UP AND MAKE DEMANDS OF YOU AND NOT EXPECT IT TO DEVOLVE INTO A COMPLETELY POINTLESS ARGUMENT, LIKE THAT WASN'T THE MOST OBVIOUS FUCKING OUTCOME EVER
IT DOESN'T CHANGE THE FACT THAT YOUR BEHAVIOR IN THIS HAS BEEN NOTHING SHORT OF RETARDED.
I ASK YOU WHAT THE FUCK YOU INTENDED TO DO WITH THE CATS WHEN, AS I UNDERSTAND IT, YOU LIVE IN CENTRAL PARK.
YOU WERE PERFECTLY HAPPY TO LET KANAYA LOOK AFTER THEM BEFORE SHE TURNED IT INTO THIS BIG POINT OF CONTENTION, WEREN'T YOU?
THE PAIR OF YOU ARE TURNING THOSE UNFORTUNATE FELINES INTO AMMUNITION FOR YOUR EXTENDED FEUD.
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:33 < if i had i wouldve tried to k33p them away since its obviously such a huge bother fur her
:33 < and i was going to go hang out in the mac fur a while with them since appurrently just letting them do their own thing is a big fat crime now
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LIKE, CHECK THIS OUT: FIRST SHE TELLS YOU SHE DOESN'T WANT THEM, THEN YOU SAY YOU WON'T TAKE THEM, THEN SHE SAYS SHE'S GOING TO KEEP THEM, AND SUDDENLY YOU WANT TO TAKE THEM.
IT SEEMS TO ME LIKE THIS DOESN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE ACTUAL CATS THEMSELVES, AND HAS MORE TO DO WITH YOUR APPARENT RECENT INABILITY TO AGREE WITH ONE ANOTHER ON LITERALLY ANYTHING AT ALL.
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:33 < its more compurrlicated than that but youre purrobably a little bit right
[this is very difficult for her to admit to, ok]
:33 < uuuuuugh why wont she leave me alone??
:33 < efurything was fine when we werent talking!
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:33 < are you sure she doesnt just miss arguing with someone?
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BUT CAN YOU REALLY EXPECT HER TO BE HONEST WITH YOU ABOUT HER FEELINGS, WITH THE WAY THINGS ARE BETWEEN YOU RIGHT NOW?
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:33 < but i think its purrfectly fine fur me to expect her not to make things worse
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NEVER EXPECT ANYONE TO NOT BE THE MOST ENTHUSIASTICALLY PAN DEFICIENT IMBECILE THEY CAN POSSIBLY BE.
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:33 < i dont really know what im supposed to do about it, though
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SHE HAS ABOUT MUCH FAITH AS YOU DO IN THE RESULT OF ANY FORM OF INTERACTION INVOLVING THE BOTH OF YOU BEING ANYTHING EVEN VAGUELY RESEMBLING SOMETHING POSITIVE
WHICH IS TO SAY EXACTLY NONE.
BUT I CAN ACT AS A GO BETWEEN, IF THERE'S ANYTHING YOU'D LIKE HER TO KNOW.
IT DOESN'T NECESSARILY HAVE TO BE GOOD, EITHER, I AM ONE HUNDRED PERCENT PREPARED TO INFORM HER OF ALL THE WAYS IN WHICH SHE HAS MANAGED TO MAKE THIS SITUATION WORSE THAN IT EVER NEEDED TO BE.
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:33 < im not sure ive got the energy fur any more of this stuff now
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JUST GIVE ME *SOMETHING* TO WORK WITH AND I'LL LEAVE YOU ALONE, I PROMISE.
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:33 < im tired of arguing
:33 < i dont care if she actually misses me or if she just wants to k33p pounding how horrible i am into my skull, if were going to end up arguing over whatever she has to say then i dont want to hear from her
:33 < you can tell her that
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FOR THE RECORD, SHE AT LEAST SHARES YOUR SENTIMENT IN THAT, FROM WHAT I COULD GATHER.
I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER. ONCE I'M DONE WITH HER.
AND THERE *WILL* BE A LATER.
ALSO? STOP BREAKING INTO HER HIVE. IF YOU COULD DO ME THAT ONE SOLID, AND MAKE MY JOB THAT MUCH EASIER, THAT WOULD BE GREAT.
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:33 < but dont get your hopes up about much else
:33 < *ac is just saying*